Posted on April 15, 2018
We all know we have one of those Moms in our lives. Also, we are obviously one or the other. I do have to say my list of Owl Mama’s is short and my list of Morning moms is short too! HaHa!
I only say that because we are all so tired we just want to sleep. So having any type of routine creates work and we are tired gosh darn it. Ha Ha.
I am totally the Morning Mom. I am sure if you are the Owl Mama, you are probably snarling right now. I know the daylight is awful and the brisk air is torturous. HaHa! Can you hear my soft sarcasm? I mean I can only be one thing and that is my sassy self. I must throw that in here every so often, yeah?
I love the 5 am wake up, the warm and fresh coffee that hits your lips, standing outside on the deck with my robe, my hot coffee and brisk air mixed with the Sunrise. Yes, that is literally a perfect wake up for me. A nice yoga session playing some calming reggae that I love so much or even sounds of nature. Seriously is my dream wake up every single day. I could do that and then slowly take my time getting ready afterward and eating a beautiful homemade breakfast with nothing but fresh food and things from scratch. I mean are you vibing what I am saying my fellow Morning Mom’s??
I have never been an Owl Mama outside of when Gracie was a Newborn and the wake ups were much more frequent. I would have my regular 3 am social media scroll time and feed Gracie 2-3 times thru the night.
Once she got a bit older and slept longer amount of hours straight, I went right back to an early rest time because I knew what was coming at 5-6 am. We as parents need to be cautious of that. I know I am super guilty of staying up late, knowing I am an early riser just trying to fit in some extra spouse time. When 6 am rolls around I come to remember the reason why I am a Morning Mom beside the things I love so much about the AM.
For all you Morning Moms I just have to say I get it! I get that you want to enjoy all the things you love about those SUPER early mornings and how much you can fit in some personal time that is QUIET.
I also know that you Morning Moms are tired from normal late nights or teething babies. Perhaps your exhausted from just your normal routine and getting up early anymore is just not as an enjoyable personal time.
You get up with the kids and make breakfast and coffee, pick up the house from what didn’t get picked up last night due to being so exhausted. Loading some last minute dishes or maybe starting some laundry while you sip on coffee. I mean we all have different routines and we also don’t ALL experience having craziness. Some Morning Moms have some legit routines that stay firm and keep energy! I don’t know how they do it. They very well could be an alien or robot… Ha
Being a Morning Mom and missing MY routine. The one that I could wake up, roll over and do nothing or wake up and go make just a coffee and sit in total silence wrapped in my soft fuzzy blanket and my adorable fuzzy socks. The ones you can slip and slide with on the wood floors. Because, its fun, duh. Oh, and I am also a big kid. Take your judgment elsewhere. Ha
However, I also am so grateful I got to trade My personal routine into a routine that includes a little midget me. The routine that involves dance parties, and yells singing at 7 am, the shower I am given on the OUTSIDE of the bath and of course all the kisses I get as soon as I open my eyes.
I am so thankful I could trade a regular old routine for a Supercharged one full of love and laughter. Even the chaos is embraced.
Stay strong Morning Mom, these times don’t last forever. Hold them tight, embrace those kisses, take on the water whale in the mornings and laugh thru it all. Before you know it, they will need you less and less. Our little humans rely on us and what we provide for them. So continue smothering those squishy, soft little faces with your early AM kisses.
♥Night Owl Mama♥
For those of you Mamas that either work hours that make you be awake all wee hours of the night or you are a Vampire. HaHa
I really don’t know if you can convince me otherwise that you have actually lost your mind with WANTING to be that Night owl, Mama. I mean I get it if you have work to do, or perhaps want to fit in some time with the hubby or some social event. Those are all normal and things any Morning mom would do to.
However, I know that some of you Night Owl Mamas out there are scrubbing your bathtubs, mopping your floors, folding laundry, going thru cabinets to organize and even some moms are doing things like midnight scrapbooking. I know we need to fit things in and get them done, but how are you not totally wiped?!
I am also questioning the fact that these Night Owl mamas might potentially be like some sort of covert Superheroes with powers we are lacking as Morning Moms. HaHa. Okay, that is a bit dramatic but you’re getting my point. I mean can we really be sure what you Owl Mamas are doing at 1-2 am, cleaning like you just slammed 5 red bulls. HaHa
I was once an Owl… Before I had a kid.
I know there are also those Owl Mamas that like to actually go out on a regular in the night time. After 9 pm! I mean, I need to be celebrating a master degree, a new baby, or a big milestone birthday to have me out after 9 pm anymore. I am normally seeing double by that time. Again tho, I rise at an early ass hour and my daughter is totally gripping onto my energy with that. Good and Bad. HaHa
I am thoroughly am impressed with how the Night owl mams even manage getting out and getting back up the next morning with anything other than a headache and smeared makeup. No joke, round of applause for your insane endurance. HaHa
If you try to drag me out at 9 pm your best bet is bribing me with money or if you wanting to be cheap, I’ll settle for chocolate and some fresh fruit. HaHa
I am going to continue applauding all you Owl mams for the abilities you have, even tho they sorta freak me out. HaHa. I still Love you tho.
For all, you Fellow Morning Mama’s, enjoy that Sunrise.
Thanks for reading, I hope I was able to share a laugh or two with you.
X O X O
Posted on April 14, 2018
Well, this is a topic that feels really touchy to me for some reason. Probably mostly because I live the stuff I am about to share with you. See before I had my daughter I knew that things would alter after I would have a child. I was not completely oblivious to the things I would see around me with other moms. I did not pay much attention to that tho, I just continued my pre-baby life.
So being a 20 something, young bartender who was out every night with her “Friends.” We would bar hop, laugh, and create those crazy memories that we would carry with us thru the rest of our lives. Always a total blast.
My ride or die, friends, the ones I knew I could call at any given time and we would always carve that space out for one another. Always.
However that meant for me, my friendships were the most important thing I valued. Not just because I loved them all but, because I was sharing moments and memories with these people that I would never share with anyone else. Creating a bond.
Before having my beautiful Gracie, I would be able to basically do as I wanted at any given time or day. I could drop everything and leave the damn country If I wanted to. It was a beautiful freedom that I embraced as much as I could, while I could.
The truth about friends when you are young and dumb, doing things you should not be building friendships or relationships off of. They are your friends during those amazing times in life will be there, right by your side, ride or die and they will be the most important people in your lives. When you want to go out, they go out. When the group rallies to hit the road for a road trip, you Go! Because in those times, you are given so much more freedom to make those spontaneous choices.
Don’t get me wrong it was amazing and I lived every moment I could in a spontaneous way. I embraced the crazy, I took on the challenges, I basically would travel with my eyes closed because I loved the idea of not knowing what was going to come. I remember flying to another state with a ticket a friend purchased me, and I had never even met them. Picked me up from the airport and the risk was worth taking. I created a massive amount of memories with that human and the friends they brought into my life.
Friendships at that time in my life were dependable. Solely on two things, I believe and they are because that person loved me for who I was and we had created a great friendship. As well as, they were more dependable because, kids were not involved.
See what I mean by that is this, Friendships BEFORE a child musters up into one word for me personally and its “Freedom.”
Before baby allows you more FREEdom for some of these reasons:
1. Freely Sleep in
2. Freely Shower
3. Freely Eat your own food
4. Freely Drink HOT coffee
5. Freely have Sex
6. Freely Travel
7. Freely spend the extra cash
8. Freely move around
9. Freely Party… if you’re into that
10. Freely be FREE
Now above as I mentioned some of the things you can Freely do before Motherhood. Now, not all those things you can do with your friends but you get the drift.
I love being a Mom more than I enjoy literally anything. It was something I wanted my whole life was to be a Mom. But I still have to be honest about the fact that Friends before being a mom was SO different than after. Even when they have kids and you have kids it does not matter. Friendships change because people change.
This has always been something difficult for me to deal with mostly because I have an insecurity with people leaving me. I hate when you pour your heart into someone and let them in your life, emotions and share things on a level you wouldn’t just with anyone. To only be let down due to natural reasons. Change. But I can not help the fact that it hurts my heart.
It’s so strange to me because I am such a creature of change and have always endured that. So for me to have a conflict with the fact that people change, is so strange to me. But sometimes we can not control our feelings and I am also learning to accept that. I am not a controlling person but I do not like being out of control of myself.
See I have come to find that the friends I grew up with as a child, some of that friendship I am lucky to still have today. Even tho we live in distance or don’t talk every day or even every week. If we picked up the phone it would be as if no days have gone unspoken. Ya know? I particularly have 4 of those left and sadly lost 1 of them recently and very suddenly. ( I love you, Scotty )
As we grew up and became parents, all at different ages and times in our lives. Always stayed in contact of course but, nonetheless we grew apart. Not on purpose but due to change.
We would all cross paths here and there thru the years and find each other lifting one another up when needed. I value those 3 more than I think they will ever know. Partially because motherhood can be time-consuming and have a family takes the rest of the free time you do have. So those friendships that I value so much sometimes get put on the back burner and I hate it. But it will never demean the love I have for them. I know when I am 60, we can start again and pick back up creating senior citizen memories. HaHa
Things that happen AFTER Motherhood:
1. No sleep
2. No Extra Time
3. Lack of food
4. Lack of Hydration
5. Lack of hygiene care
6. No EXTRA energy
9. Make time for your Spouse
10. Make time for Relatives
You see what I am getting at?
These things are just some of the things that are a day in and day out that we endure in motherhood. The endless chores and the tasks we need to accomplish. We have personal lives on top of all of this, yet our personal lives end up being placed on the back burner. Just like our friendships…
Now again, this is NOT something I am claiming happens to everyone or all moms. But I can only speak from experience. I do know there are a large number of women who have been beyond blessed with constant people in their lives. I also feel as if I hear from other moms and parents the same issues with friendships that I have endured tho.
Once you become a mom and have children life alters dramatically. Taking care of that little human, protecting them within reason, being sure they are healthy and in good environments.
When I was pregnant I thought, oh my daughter is gonna have so many friends and her besties by her side. All the normal stuff we have hopes and dreams about. The Daydream, picture perfect hopes that I will have mommy friends and good support. What I personally did not put into perspective was, how will those others parent. I mean we collectively as Moms all say we will do one thing when we are pregnant, then one year old and you don’t care anymore how much dirt they eat. Just no rocks. ( giggling )
It breaks my heart that I have had to distance myself over time from people. But it is what is best for Gracie, me and my marriage. Not that particularly the people are toxic, or bad. But the choices they make I can not support or be a part of. I mean I am all for doing what makes you happy. Sometimes it just won’t involves me and I am learning to live with a little sadness due to that. But in time acceptance will come and I will heal.
However, a heavy heart is what I have carried around for a while. Thankfully my Daughter and my Marriage give me the Sunshine I need to keep me out of the dark when my heart gets too heavy from, feelings. I have found I much more of an emotional person since having a baby. I’ve gotten soft darn it…
What I am trying to say is, Parents are all going to be different. We are ALL going to allow some things and others won’t. It does NOT make you better than me or me better than you. It means over the time span of going from FREEDOM to MOTHERHOOD is a massive change. Not everyone is going to manage that type of change the same way. It took me some deep thought to process that. Managing change is handled in the hands of every person so incredibly different. We should as Moms should be more sensitive to that.
So in my perspective, Yes friendships are so much more active before having a child. But it doesn’t mean they are less valued after you stop hanging out or you don’t talk as much. I have come to the realization that I do that. I am the Mom that distances herself from parents I can not find enough common ground with. I am not sure if it is a pro or con yet. If it’s to much work to be friends, we shouldn’t be friends. That is where my brain goes and that just being totally honest. I mean, I am just a person that would prefer things to come more naturally and not so tense to find something to mingle about.
Yet here I find myself trying to make mom friends that I struggle finding enough common ground with.
Its a constant battle with myself due to expectations of wishing that person would be more like this or that so we could be more similar. Ya know? Like I have met moms who are SO awesome! But then you meet their kid and you’re like, nope. I know you know what I am talking about.
I am a work in progress with not expecting from others. Please don’t misunderstand that I am some expectation freak, that is not the case. Just on this particular topic, I have an expectation issue.
I have never thought I did this until I became a Mom. I started placing expectations on other moms wanting them to so badly to be more attentive or give more love. That was not my place and I quickly learned it is not where I belong. I never mean for it to be negative or mean, I only show attention to things because I care genuinely. I truly only have good intentions in my life.
I know that a lot of this was all over the place and I am grateful you stuck it out with me and read this far. Sometimes getting things out and on here is the best therapy I can give myself. I am only Human and I am only one person.
In the end, I am thankful I have realized what I need to change in order to accept that change is not just within me. Its everywhere around me and within others as well. In the chaos of Motherhood and Life, I just think I need to remind myself of those things more often.
Random thought: Perhaps a Motivational quote reminder daily? I’ll be looking more into this.
Reflecting is not a time I get much nowadays, so sometimes it takes me longer to learn or recognize issues than it would have before motherhood.
Every day I chose to try and be better, not bitter and that is enough for me.
I just hope that within the changes that are always so rapidly happening. I can grasp some MOM friends and keep them around for good. No more in and outs. My hopes for what I would love to create here on my blog. Bringing moms together and allowing an open space for all of us to connect. It is something I value in my days as I get older. I know there are so many places online nowadays to find what I hope to build here. Perhaps we can be friends too.
Thanks for reading.
P.S. For my near and dear friends I have now, I love you and I value you. ♥
I came here to be Honest. This is my attempt to sharing my Part 2 of my Personal Feelings and thoughts. I am Here to share me in full transparency.
Posted on April 11, 2018
Hey Everyone, you may have already read some of my posts and things I have shared about my personal life. However you also might be here for the first time, have no idea who I am, where I come from or why you are even really reading this now. Well honestly this post is going to be from my heart, my mind and collectively will be some hard truths shared. Some of the stuff scares the hell out of me to share because I might really hurt someone’s feelings or make them hate me.
But I cant keep living my life in fear of how someone else might react or respond to my personal feelings. I have the right to share how I feel or what I think. But picking and choosing what is spoken is also the tough part. Someone once told me to just, “Bite my tongue.” I got the drift of it for the most part but, I also feel like sometimes I am walking around with a mouthful of blood from biting down so long.
Which is why I am here, right now writing this piece as I am scared to be this transparent about just who I am and things I have been thru or seen. This post is going to be rather long so get comfortable, grab a beverage and cozy up.
I just want to say in advance because if I didn’t I wouldn’t be me. What I write here today is not meant to hurt anyone, point out fault, make anyone feel low, bad or less. Nothing about this post is about anyone other than myself and sharing my thoughts and feelings with, you.
So, Here I go…
Not raised in your All American family home, but a mother that always showed massive amounts of hugs, kisses and Good night wishes. She was a hard-working woman who came from a fairly tough bring up. Airforce brat child is what they call them I guess. She moved around a lot, her dad was KIA in the Military and her Mom was remarried to another man. My grandma and grandpa are no longer with us.
Grandma was Full blooded Japanese and struggled with things like reading English and Writing. My Step Grandpa was the White American Military man that went overseas and married the foreign mom with 3 kids. He had 2 children himself. My mom had to grow up with alcohol abuse in the home and a lot of unhealthy fights and aggression. Creating my mom to leave the home at a young age and got married. She then had my sister at age 20, later getting a divorce from him she met my Dad. At 25, I came into this world joining my sister.
Now, my Dad was the “Free Spirit” type. Which is a lot of where I get it from and I love that about myself. It has allowed me to discover more than I would of about myself that if I did not have that free spirit attitude.
However, my dad also came with addiction problems and issues which caused him not be around, later resulting in separation with my Mom. Him being gone so much really didn’t seem like much changed when they actually separated. I was also only 7 years old when they actually separated. I remember the age mostly because a lot of shit happened in my life starting when I was 6. Its also when I actually started being able to remember stuff. He was sick, an addict and those two things stole my dad and my childhood with him, away. I didn’t get the hero dad around the house wearing the cape and chasing me around. I didn’t get the protection, daddy promises or good night kisses. Because he was gone or out doing whatever he was doing. I forgive him.
If you’re asking why, its because MY dad would never have done the things he did if he wasn’t sick. We need to learn to forgive more and become more understanding. God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason. I am guessing you can hint why that is. Listen more, talk less. Sometimes we need to listen to someone’s story and understand their purpose in order to move forward with forgiveness. So I choose to listen more and do as God intended me to do.
Am I mad today? No. Was I hurt? Yes. For a long time, I held something inside I didn’t understand so I didn’t approach it. As I got older I began to understand more and started to work on myself. I moved on and worked through what I know I needed to for myself and to ever be able to have a healthy relationship after being exposed to so many unhealthy ones. If it did anything to me having a dad like that, it was that it made me not trust men. I was fearful they would be like my dad or I would just assume and it caused fights. I’m not perfect, but I recognized it and I knew it was not healthy. So I changed. It also made me sad that I didn’t have that bond. The father and daughter type that you see so many little girls have. I admired it every time I would see a dad holding his little girl’s hand because there is something so special about that relationship.
I’m good tho, and I am able to say I worked thru those demons and successfully WON!
So today the relationship that Gracie and her daddy have is one of the most important things to me. I cherish watching it grow and flourish into this beautiful bond. It’s amazing you guys. I am sure you do the same thing with your love and your littles. It’s such a beautiful thing to watch blossom and seeing his eyes light up when he sees his little girl is just, priceless. Imprinted forever.
Sharing some little details here and there about my parents and tidbits about my feelings on different topics that fell in the sentences. I sit here right now not even shitting you, I am totally just going with the flow of this as I write and so if it seems like I might jump around a little, I do apologize. I’m doing my best to organize all this. But I wanted it to be natural and from my heart, so I am typing and being real.
Things I would see…
I am gonna share with you just a couple stories from my past as a child, and then as a teenager, moving into young adulthood and into my life today.
So, here comes some short stories and complete transparency on my end. These are NOT things I air or share, day in and day out. So this is hard for me but, what if get it off my chest and feel like 1000x’s better!? I mean, not that I am feeling like shit but, the feeling of just total transparency is almost healthy. I know that when I get anything off my chest I feel better.
So I figured I would share some stuff here and maybe, just maybe it would make me feel better, allow you to get to know me and more about where I come from and perhaps it will be just another door for me to feel more confident in sharing with you.
Because in the end is that not why I write. I mean this is my space to be me, my area to freely speak and openly share who I am or how I feel about shit. So this is another one of my attempts at that.
Age 2 living Spokane, my mom is away at work and its daytime. My older sister is with me and my dad is watching us as my sister is only 7. My dad was passed out on the bed, recovering from a prior night. Our babysitter came over and took us to go roller skating, we made sure of course to let my dad know. Well hours later he woke up and we were not there. He panicked and called my mom who then called the police.
He was not coherent enough to remember someone telling him about us leaving. The Police department, fire trucks, helicopters and the news crew was all over looking for us. Can you believe that?! Crazy shit. We were on the news as if we were abducted, while we are just enjoying pizza, licorice rope and some roller skating at the rink.
3 hours or so later we come home and its just total chaos! I actually only vaguely can remember some glimpses of things because I was so little. The story was told to me and I was laughing yet at the same time my mouth was wide open in shock. Just is not a story you hear every day.
Age 6 my mom is looking for her car and my best friend is in the back seat with me, while her mom is driving and my mom is up front. I actually remember parts of this story which is why I can share it. Only parts and pieces, but its just a totally crazy ass story for a 6-year-old to witness.
Downtown Spokane and we are driving around looking for my mom’s vehicle. We pull up to this strange looking white house and two black men come out with weapons threatening my mom. She was yelling, fearless as always. A lioness.
While I am in the back seat witnessing this all godown and crying, scared that my mom was going to get hurt. I remember my friend’s mom, Cathy looking back and telling me, “Its okay honey, your mama is tough!”
Well, I didn’t know what was really going on at the moment other than people were shouting and there were guns. Eventually, my mom got her car and w drove away as if it was another day. I don’t know what happened from that or what came of it other than my mom had her car back.
I’m a Teenager now
Age 14 my mom is in a relationship she has had for about 6 years now. He is an Alcoholic and worked for the Railroad. I went out one night for a birthday party at a hotel for a swim thing. The birthday boy was one of my very close friends over the last 5 years and I went to innocently celebrate AS A KID.
I came home around 10 pm because my mom gave permission for that time. my friends Mom had me home on time as always, because she is amazing.
The moment I walked in the door it was full of chaos. My mom’s boyfriend was wasted and calling me a “whore” a “slut.” Basically shaming me as if I just had a train ran on me. I was a virgin and 14 years old. I proceeded to cry but defend myself as well as my mom defended me.
It ended with me packing a bag and going to my sisters for a few days. It was an ugly chapter in life. But we moved through that thankfully.
Age 14 witnessed my first dead body. I was walking with my stepsister at the time to a local gas station. We were going for some snacks of course and the regular soda run as a teenager. We walked past the fence line noticing something sitting against the shed that was at the house next to the store.
We instantly looked closer thru the fence, and there it was. The discolored looking body. Was a memory I will never forget and something I feel like sticks with you in a dark sorta way.
In my 20’s
21 years old and I took myself to a place called Apple Blossom. It is a car event or something along those lines. I just knew it gave one hell of a party and I was looking for fun. There I went and mingled at the local party scene, meeting some random new friends and taking myself back to their house.
Yeah, I lived like this for years. I have no idea how I survived when I look back now.
So I am here at this person house and it’s HUGE! Like mansion huge. The girls were all rad and the guys I had met there were pretty chill. Took some Ex and had a party in the pool, with my clothes on. I just thought to jump in was a good idea and I wasn’t doing it naked. No matter how high I was at the time.
So after a good 4 hours or so of in and out of the pool and having fun I go inside to get some clothes that one of the girls had offered me. We walked in on a guy raping a girl on the floor in one of the rooms. Not even shitting you.
The chick ran outside to get the other guys as I proceeded to get the pool stick. Yeah, because I was not fucking around no matter how messed up I was. I took that stick and hit him so hard across his back, he fell and as that happened the guys rushed in. I ran to the girl, wrapped her in a blanket that she was laying near. The other chick came with me and took the victim to the bathroom. We closed the door and helped calm her and comfort her. The guys took care of that man, called the cops and the cops handled it from there.
I hope she is okay today after such a horrible event.
32 years old today and I am walking slowly into 33 as my birthday creeps around the corner in November.
Recently some events have happened and things have been shared with me that have shaken me to the core. There are only some things that I can morally share here today in this story but, I will share.
Nothing about my life is glamorous. My life is special because of the people in it.
See about a year ago I was told some pretty heavy stuff and it was news I really still do not know how to deal with or move on with a sense of healing.
Last year I was told that someone I love and is Very dear to my heart, was assaulted numerous times thru her life as a child. I did not know how to wrap my head around this or what to even say. What do you say? I felt so much anger and sadness at the same time. I just wanted to hug her and make her feel safe.
She asked to not speak about it and to respect her wishes. I did out of love. I kept my mouth filtered for a year up until the day I was put in the position to share it. I chose to share it willingly and I took responsibility for that. But the person it was shared with was family. It was important it was shared, I would not have done it if it was not.
So that was some of the heaviness I have endured emotionally and mentally knowing that happened.There is always more to the story, however, that is morally not okay for me to air here today.
A second heavy is the loss of the guy I mentioned who’s birthday party I celebrated at that hotel swim thing. His name was Scott, he is probably one of the only names I will actually mention and that is because he passed away.
March 6th, 2018 I received the phone call from my other childhood brother bestie. He proceeded to tell me the tidbits of what he knew and we spoke for about an hour.
6 months prior to this event I got a message from Scott, reaching out just trying to chat. He did that from time to time. See Scott was sick with a few different illnesses. My Scotty was a war hero who suffered from severe PTSD as well as acquiring an addiction to alcohol over his time span of battling his PTSD.
Scott was sick and we knew that he had ups and downs and would continuously just disappear and hurt my feelings. Not intentionally, of course, he loved me like his own sister. He was just consumed with his illness.
So over that 6 months time span he reached out 4 times. I had to turn Scott away every time because I knew what would come of it. Now that I had Gracie and we were an established family I had to protect that. My nest was the safe place for our daughter and I couldn’t compromise that with his actions. Even tho my love for him was endless, the choice was one of the hardest I have faced yet. Choosing my family is easy, but dismissing was not.
I knew that If I picked up that phone I would fall for it because its what I did. I wanted to continuously save and help him. Well, that energy needed to go to my husband and my little girl.
So I made that choice and It is hard to live with every single day. The swipe of the delete on my phone replays and its a daily task to work thru it. But I am confident in my will and I know I can win this battle and come to peace with this.
Wrapping it up…
Well now that I have shared some of my stories with you and where I have been and some things I have seen or been through. I told you in the beginning maybe I would feel better.
I guess I won’t know until its out there and shared with all of you. I’m sure in more time I will share more of my story and things I have been thru.
I hope you come and read more and get to know me and where I come from. Please share your thoughts or maybe even a personal story. You never know what it can do to share it until you do.
PS.. I probably could have shared a lot more. However I am going to save that for another post. Thanks for reading.
Posted on April 10, 2018
There are days that I wake up and I feel like a total Winner before I have even taken on the day. There are also days that I wake up wishing that I was somewhere else. Does that make me a Bad Mom or Wife? Well, I guess that depends on who you are asking. But if you were to ask for my answer it would be a simple, No.
Wanting or wishing to be out of the normal, out of routine, something exciting, different. Right? Maybe you’re looking for a few shades of blue in the water, a sunset that would take your breath away or simply wake up to a fresh breakfast and squeezed juice. You know the ones they serve you in bed at those fancy resorts. The smell of ocean water, and warm feeling of the sun on your skin. I mean, I get it. I wish I could be there every single day. Sometimes alone, but most times with my Family.
What I used to allow…
See I used to let myself feel really bad for just wishing or wanting. The guilt I let live with me was unhealthy and not right. But it made me feel ungrateful to wish or want. Wishing I could have my husband home with us every day. Wanting every single 24 hours in a day to be smooth, fun, and full of laughter. Can you believe that we allow ourselves to feel bad for wanting or wishing for things? Its total nonsense why we allow ourselves to do that.
Wanting and Wishing for things will never diminish or demean the amount of love and gratefulness I have for my Life, my Family and the people I surround myself with. Nor will it for you. Gracie and my Husband are everything to me, and me wanting more or wishing for different does not change that or alter any feelings at all.
I share this with you today because I know that you might have had a day like this or moments of just pondering what life would be like if any given situation was different. I know that you daydream, and hope for more in life. I know that as Mom I can only speak from experience on how I have felt or things I have personally come to counter with.
We Are All Moms
But I know that regardless of you or me being different people, we are both still Moms. Which means the playing field is pretty stinking similar, and we tend to battle a lot of the same fights. The problem here is that we don’t know how to be teammates anymore. We have all become so incredibly competitive with one another that a lot of Moms feel like they cant win because we aren’t lifting each other up like we should be as teammates on the same field. So start slapping some ass and get the energy going! Ha Ha ( Lightening the Mood )
Why am I using an analogy similar to sports? I have no idea other than the fact that it resembles and is easily explained when used in these terms.
Just go with It…
Every single day I am battling toys everywhere, dirty dishes, messy counters, bathrooms that need to be cleaned daily for some reason and I don’t know why but there are throw blankets everywhere! Now don’t get me wrong I am not interested in cleaning my house non stop. Even tho it seriously helps my sanity, it does not help my back. Plus I see Gracie watching me frantically trying to maintain the mess and it just always causes me to stop. Every single time. I look at her and see the little devious smile that just makes me giggle and run after her. The toys and everything else can wait because right now I am gonna chase my daughter and play.
I bet you thought I was just going to be negative this whole time. Well, rest assure here comes the positive stuff.
See through all the Madness and Mess I have finally discovered HOW to find the Magic and the Miracles. Its what I like to call the M&M vs M&M. I know I am sort of a weirdo and I hope you can love me anyway. Ha Ha.
Finding the Magic is found in the Madness. Finding the Miracles is found in the Mess.
Let me explain my thought process on this and why it is so cool how I came to figure this out.
Madness is simply put as crazy in my terms. For example, Ryan and I were chasing Gracie and playing around for a good 20 minutes or longer. We were laughing and yelling, throwing her bouncing ball and kicking the soccer ball around. If anyone were to have been a fly on the wall it would have looked like Madness. In those moments near the end, Gracie tripped and fell and started to cry. Ryan and I, of course, went to her and hugged her tight, told her it was okay and she was tough like a bear! The Magic at the moment when she looked at us when we were comforting her was absolutely priceless and I will never forget that look.
My point in that is no matter what the situation good or bad, there is always GOOD. Always. Sometimes it is just more challenging to find it or grasp it properly. Don’t worry you’ll get this down and once you can successfully turn your Madness into Magic, share it with us here.
Now a little story of me finding Miracles in Messes. Gracie was about a year old and we started really introducing a lot of different and new foods. At first, as we know that is really tough just finding the right stuff, knowing if its safe, is it too big or too small, are they going to allergic or the worst one is, will they choke. I am still like that today!
Gracie would continuously throw her food EVERYWHERE! I mean we had no idea what we were doing in this sense or what we should allow. So we went with it and cleaned it up but not without frustration and just being upset in general that she wouldn’t eat it or she would waste the food. I mean we are only human and we were new to it all. Well after about a month of this struggle and just so much wasted energy we gave her spaghetti…
10 Minutes later we now had an Oompa Loompa as a child. HAHA! I mean this moment was pure bliss! We were dying laughing and as you can see in the picture, she was pretty happy with herself. So this is the moment I had clarity that no matter the Mess there is always moments of Miracles! We had a miracle that moment. She had a new found love for a type of food, we won finally with some grub and she was SO happy and not throwing her food! It was a wonderful dinner and time of lesson.
So those are my two reasons why I can find basically the good in the bad. We all have to find our own ways to dance thru life and organize our thoughts. Its just important to handle the trips in dancing like a professional would and that we filter our thoughts to keep them positive.
Attitude is 80% of the day when only 10% is affected by your work.
I hope you found some clarity here today and maybe I was able to share a laugh. Comment below with any thoughts or input you’d like to share! Thanks for reading.
These Top 5 YouTube Mom Sensation Channels will have you Laughing your Buns off or Crying your eyes out. Either way, you will relate as a Mom
Posted on April 9, 2018
As a Full time stay at home Mom I end up with what I like to call “Zombie Mombie Time.” This is a time you’re given to usually sit and zone the hell out on some funny ass videos. Because you know what? I do not care what anyone thinks about the fact that I Love watching Funny Mom videos. They bring laughter to my day and sometimes they even make me feel not so crazy. When you can find a Mom Youtuber that you can really find common ground with, you stick with her and watch her videos. Supporting her journey and laughing along with her.
Now I have a fair selection of YouTube Moms that I favor. Around 20 channels and different moms. But these 5 I am sharing with you are the channels I frequent the most. Mostly because they are funny as shit, keep it real, and they do not give a rats rear what you think or anyone else thinks. Which, I really like! My type of gals!
MY TOP 5 FAVORITES
These two Moms are The Top of my list! I adore who they are, the message they are shooting for, what they want to build and their personalities are absolutely Star bright. So Funny. Their MOM TRUTHS are seriously Hilarious and if they do not make you laugh your ass off…
You are not from here. I’m convinced.
Kristina Kuzmic is someone I normally watch every single day. Something about her personality and the way she speaks is so comforting yet brutally honest. She has a way of delivering hard truths in a kind way. She has a sense of ease but also firmness. A Unicorn Mom is what she is to me. Rare, beautiful and she works some serious magic in what she does.
Check her YouTube channel out Here. Im going to share with you one of my favorite videos of hers. I watch this at least once a month, so should you. If your feeling defeated as a mom today, this Video will hopefully cheer you up. ❤
Here you are gonna find yourself dying with laughter. Juggling the Jenkins is a Fast growing channel. She has facial expressions that will have you rolling, stories that will have you crying from laughter but yet she will sneak right in with some sappy stuff. Touching your heart and tugging at your feelings. Jenkins channel is absolutely worth placing on your subscribe list and videos you watch on a daily.
The link you need for her Channel is here and I am gonna actually share a couple videos from Jenkins. ❤ One Funny and one more that offers heartfelt emotion. Choose at your own risk.
Above you will find a Video that will show you what serious jokes and laughter is about with your best friend. Or maybe, all your friends?…
The below video is a real, raw and straight forward video that is gonna have you feeling all sorts of things inside. Go with it. ♥
If you love that feeling of a good Southern Hug. You are gonna Love Melissa Radke! I swear this woman right here can make you feel her warm hug all the way from wherever the heck she is. I just know she makes me smile, feel good when im down, and she can help me feel revived with my faith on any given day when I need that pick me up. Melissa is also a woman of faith. So if that is also your thing, that is just another reason to watch her!
Here is her YouTube channel and I am going to of course share one of my favorites that I came across after I discovered her. Which I also found her on Facebook and you can find that Here. She is so loving yet she carries true sass, which delivers all the laughter you need.
Tanya, Tanya, Tanya. Oh my Gosh you guys will be rolling for sure when you watch any of her videos. She is always doing imitations and it is hilarious. Absolutely worth clicking on and viewing her ENTIRE channel. If you have the time that is. Normally Tanya is my Bathtub entertainment. I have absolutely no idea why that is relevant, probably is not. But, this is my blog post and it is about my thoughts on the channels I watch. Ha Ha. So yeah, I’ll admit she is my entertainment when I take soak. ( Laughing )
Here is her YouTube channel and below is my all time favorite video of hers. Tanya has almost 60K subscribers. Join the wagon of fun and subscribe to her channel today!
Okay everyone, now that I have shared with you my Top 5 favorite Youtube Channels off of my personal list of favorites. In the comment section below please let Us know what you liked about them, if you liked them or if you chose to subscribe. Thanks for reading and I hope you “Liked.”
Posted on April 8, 2018
As we know planning a birthday party for your little one can be stressful, let alone spendy nowadays. I won’t even be modest, we spent $500 on the 1st Birthday. Can you believe that?! I mean, it was the first Birthday and we will never do it again. But, it was a lot of dough for a 2-hour celebration. I also had no idea what I was doing or how to cut corners to save a buck properly and still have style. I would search around and everything was just all over the place. So many times I had wished everything was in one place. The list of the Basics to throw the party, some ideas, and budget-friendly options. Doesn’t that sound amazing?!
So here I am just shy of 6 months out of planning my daughters 2nd Birthday. Holy moly I can not believe that. Well personally, we decided on Rainbow colors with splashes of Unicorns. Instead of it being Unicorn everything with splashes of a rainbow. You see we came to realize it is going to be way more expensive to buy everything Unicorn rather than buy a bunch of colors of stuff creating a rainbow effect. We will buy small things to add the Unicorn touch and feel of the party. Also, it doesn’t overbear the party with a million unicorn items. (Even though Unicorns are fricking amazing)
Well, I wanted to put together my personal task list of what I do when I plan a party for my daughter. I am not claiming this will solve every problem you will have, or answer all your solutions to what you’re looking for. But, I can tell you that this is a good place to start.
I am going to offer Images for visual thoughts, links that lead you to websites which will offer items referred to in the images. I will also attach Budget-friendly options with some DIY and home crafting to help save some money, add your personal touch to the party if that is what you like. However, for those moms that just would really like a party in a box, I got you covered. I will share information that will allow you be at a click of a button to save.
My Personal Task List for Planning a Budget friendly Toddler Party
Pick a Date
I know this seems like an obvious to do. However, it is the most important thing to have the date set in advance. I mean sometimes you gotta have the birthday the weekend before or the weekend after. Sometimes, their birthdays fall in the middle of the week, and they throw a tantrum because they want to have their birthday on their actual birthday. You know what I am talking about because I have seen it with my own two viewers. Personally, I have not run into this issue with picking a day. This year it falls on a Sunday, thank you, Jesus. So we are having it on a Saturday because that works better for everyone. So, Pick a date!
In my experience, I have a daughter that has a September Birthday. Which allows us to have outside celebrations because it is right at the end of our summer season. So, we don’t need to concern ourselves (as of now) with booking a location or space. But for those of you that will need to book a space or maybe a Bounce house if it is in your location. Here is just a local business that offers that. If you are looking for something like a bounce house for your backyard celebrations. Here is a quick Google search engine to find it! (Search Bounce House)
You will find a neat link Here that offers a way to just find the bounce house for your toddler party. All you need to do is put in your zip code and it will let you know if they serve the area or have locations to offer! That simple. Also for those of you who like Park parties, which I am a huge fan of. I would just suggest getting to the spot you want, EARLY. Set up and hang out!
If you have a cold season birthday, don’t worry. I will be talking about all sorts of indoor options for celebrating and finding cost savings while doing it in style.
Creating the Invite List
First, to admit, this is the one part I do not personally enjoy. Sometimes you actually have to Not invite people. How mean is that? Ha Ha. But this is me being real, even tho I am trying to share some serious tips. I am allowed to still be my sassy self, yeah?
So when making your invite list, be sure you put all things into consideration. Here is my list of where my brain can go.
- How many are staying the night?
- Is anyone even staying?
- Is anyone sick? (My number 1 ha ha)
- Are you the carpool home the next day?
- Is is a ACTUAL meal being served at the party or just finger foods?
- Boys and girls?
- Boys and girls staying?
- Do I have enough Wine?
- Is my closet clean for my getaway???? ( Just kidding…)
I mean do you see? There are some real serious questions to put into place before you go inviting all sorts of people to your home. Plus, if your child is super popular with the other children. You are gonna have a wild night ahead of you. Feeling my Sarcasm?
Please for the love of Jesus make some Invites. I know that social media is the free option and I completely understand that. But here you find options to some very fair prices in ordering and custom making your toddlers birthdays invites. Keepsakes are so special in the long run. For those of you that are in a bind and really just need some budget friendly ways to DIY. Here and Here are two ways to inexpensively create your own beautiful and thoughtful cards. I also found Free printable options Here!
Tip– Go buy the Stamps the day you order the Invites. Have them set aside and ready for when they arrive.
If you can: Order a stamp that offers you your mailing address made on it. It will save your hand from writing more than you need to!
THEME or COLORS or BOTH
This is when I started getting confused and totally scatter brained because I had no idea which way to go. I mean do I focus on color, a cartoon type theme, or should I throw them together and make my job WAY tougher? Of course I choose to do both and make my life harder. But I mean that is what we do for our kiddos, right? I mean at least the first one. (Giggling) So here are my thoughts and tips on how, now that I did go thru it.
Do both! I am going to share with you ways to be able to do both, save money, have it look stylish, and eat good! I mean, that is a win when I look at it. Some of your own personal creativity will be needed. Only you know your little one best.
If you had to just do colors, it might look sorta boring and not as personal to that person. Not that I am against it or think it cant look good. because it totally can! But obviously throwing in some characters in the party really adds that splash of personal touch knowing what the little one likes. it also allows the birthday star to enjoy having their favorite character around for the party. So be sure you narrow down the character your little one is dying over currently and Here and Here are two link options. The first one you will find it is a little less custom as the second option allows you to go more in-depth with options. (Second link is literally Birthday in a box, just more options.) Which I seriously find amazing and simple and budget friendly!
These are the types of prices I am talking about! Even if Emojis is not the style of choice its the price that blows me away for such stylish and hip characters.
DIY Time If your Making Decor
I know that a lot of time you can get the small things and decor done in a short period of time. However, life happens and hiccups can cause a delay in anything. So as soon as you have the supplies you need, I suggest sitting down and getting crafty until you are finished. Get the crafts done way ahead of time if possible, I am telling you that you’ll feel a million times better knowing its all done and ready. This is a massive reason why I mentioned Number 1. ( Picking a date and being prepared)
I am really big on being as prepared as I can be on a day today. I also show myself, Grace, a lot because I forget also. Another reason I am always taking notes.
I want to share with you some Link for some Ideas and Instructions on how to make some fun and general Decorations which will be budget friendly. Now if I share a link that is a boy option for decorating, just change the colors to girl colors if that is an option with the links idea.
- Here is a fun link for those little ones that Love Mermaids!
- A really Fun way to create Activity and Decor at the same time.
- The Ballerina Daughter? Here is a link for some fun decor on that budget!
- Disney Mickey party under $200!! That is a great price for “Disney”
Activities to keep Them busy and you Sane
Toddlers use a lot of energy. Their own energy and still manage to suck up the rest of everyone else. Wait… Did I just solve how they continuously keep energy flow?! Because I mean once I run out I notice they get crazy. Wow, I am gonna think on that one more. Ha Ha!
So this is also one of my favorites because its the actual fun part of the party. So I am going to share with you just 4 ideas for some activities that can consume some time for the kids. Now they may still involve some parents and also some cleanup. But I mean, how can we get away with doing neither with a toddler? Yeah, you can’t.
My Four favorites I have discovered
- Balloon Scavenger Hunt
- Under age 5 Indoor Activities
- 29 Finds Outside! Dollar Store Friendly
- Squirt Gun Fun Grab your Paint!
Food Options and Ideas
I am a big believer in feeding! But I know that finger foods are best for toddler parties. So last year I did bite size hot dogs in crescent rolls and baked them, homemade Mac and cheese in the slow cooker for 3 hours, pretzel sticks dipped in chocolate, rice Krispies drizzled with chocolate, fruit on sticks and of course we had homemade and decorated cupcakes. My mom made her Smash cake, which she did not eat. I am telling you all of this because it was a ridiculous amount of options and I should have kept it real simple. It turned out beautifully and I am so glad I did it but, it was way more work than needed.
Now I think Finger foods are the way to go! Plus maybe one item of substance. So I will share the list I think is basic and probably would be fitting for any child’s birthday.
- Cake or Cupcakes- Having both was completely not needed and I ended up giving a lot of food away.
- One item that is substantial. If you have a summer birthday, maybe do some cold sub sandwich. Just get one big one and cut it up! Easy.
- Only 2 sweet items and keep them as simple as possible. I will share a couple ideas below.
That’s it! Those 3 listed options, don’t make it complicated for yourself. Unless you want to.
Here are some Pinterest inspired ideas I came across that I really like and could be simple and affordable.
You could do these with any colors of your choice. One bag of chocolate to melt, some cheap food coloring, and a bag of pretzels. Simple, colorful, and tasty for anyone! ( Be gluten conscious for those that may be intolerant.)
Apples with Frosting! I mean you can not find more amazing kid balance than that for a celebration. They are getting the fruit nutrition along with the sugar for celebrating. Win!
This one is always a classic favorite. Very cost friendly, tasty, and very colorful! What kid does not absolutely love Fruity Pebbles?!
Its the day of Celebration! Hopefully, you listened and you chose to get 75% of everything done ahead of time. If you didn’t I am sure you are stressed and wishing you did. Don’t worry, Next year will come quicker than you know. Be ready!
For those of you that did the preparing and organizing, enjoy sleeping in today. Because you did all that and allowed yourself time. You can sleep in, rest assure you have it all set up and ready to start decorating and cooking what is needed. If you are looking for some recipe ideas for warm item foods. Here is a link that will take you to some basic ideas.
Go get that oven going, get cleaned up and ready to head to decoration land! About time to do the actual Party Set up!
We use tables and chairs and have seating for everyone for outside for our daughters birthdays. So if you’re doing an outside celebration, be sure you get all the seating set up!
Tip- Have strong tape on hand to potentially need to tape anything down due to the possible wind! ( Consider all things! )
Have an amazing Celebration!!!
I hope you found help and some guidance here today. Please share your successes thru this article below in the comments. Thanks for reading!